If You Give a John a Paci

This past week has been a bit rocky with the John John.  Although he's been crawling and standing for awhile now he has only recently decided to explore.  He's teething.  He won't go down for naps as easily because he keeps standing up. If he can't do something he whines.  And he screams.  Like high pitched, shrill, ear piercing screams.  They're happy screams...but painfully loud none the less. He also is fluctuating between wanting his baby food and big boy food.  Every day is different.

Ninety-nine percent of the time I'm enjoying this new stage.  I feel like I am no longer just making sure John stays alive, healthy and happy, but my job as mama is truly starting.  He is officially in need of guidance, direction, and raising.  I'm busy trying to teach him that we don't touch the oven, chase the dog or play in his water bowl.  I'm allowing him to explore and trying not to be too overprotective.  I'm working in a stern "No" while allowing him to make other choices.  I realize he is only eight months old, but some things I do now to help prepare myself for later when he can understand much more of the world around him.

Anyway, yesterday was the first day I have felt truly challenged.  He was fussy and cranky.  It was insanely hot and he didn't get a good nap in.  He was busy growing his top teeth and dare I say....he might have an ear infection.  So, like the amateur I am, I decided to go out in public thinking that a quick trip out would help.  I'm a fool. We went to babies r us and things seemed to be going well.  That lasted up until I sat him in the cart and buckled him in.  He started to whine.  So, I gave him his paci.

But, if you give a John a paci, he is going to want to play with it.

He will probably start flinging it around and that will remind him that he's holding a spoon

He will take his plastic spoon and begin throwing it onto the ground

And every time he throws it he will want you to pick it up.

So you keep picking it up.

Then John will begin to see this is a game and that will remind him that he can throw really well

He will throw his spoon ten more times until you say "no more"

Then you put the spoon away and he begins to whine

Whining will make him want to scream and he will probably start with little yelps

Little yelps will begin to echo in the store and that will make him want to scream 

John will probably start screaming and then he'll want to shriek

If you allow him to shriek hoping he may stop he will keep going

And he will definitely shriek right as you pass the couple with a sleeping newborn

So you tell him no and give John a paci.

But if you give a John a paci he is going to want to play with it.

He will probably start flinging it around and that will remind him that he was holding a spoon...

Thankfully, Today is much better...and he even went down for his nap with no problem.  It's cooler outside, I remembered to buy teething tablets yesterday and I am refreshed after a full nights sleep.  Not to mention...I bought iced coffee for home...so as the baby naps...I'm sipping on a caramel macchiato and enjoying the quiet.  

                        

The Winner & A Mother's Day Reality Check

First things first.  Thank you to everybody who donated towards my trip to Africa by entering in the Noonday collection giveaway & congratulations Lindsy Wallace!  You've won!  Please contact me at AshleyObrien129 AT yahoo DOT com so I can get your beautiful (and tasty) gifts to you!



In other news...I'm struggling to write what is really on my heart because I have spent most of my Mother's day processing this.  I spent the day with a mix of emotions ranging from overjoyed to depressed & everything in between.  My heart was near bursting because I am a mommy to John John, but it ached immeasurably as I recognized the sacrifice that 'T' made for that to happen.   I ached for women still enduring the adoption process & infertility treatments & those who have miscarried & for every type of mother in between.  My heart was a roller coaster of emotions and it was exhausting.  But then...as I was busy enjoying my own motherhood, I met a woman at church...a woman with many opinions.  All of them had to do with John.  She was black.  I would say African American but she corrected me about 5 times as I called John that during our discussion.  Apparently it was an offensive term to her & she preferred black or African.  She also mentioned that John must have white parents because no black parent in their right mind would name their son John.  There was talk of his hair being poorly taken care of & ghetto.  She said that John John could have & should have stayed with his biological mom & that her family would have helped so they could get money from the government because of John.  Then she made fun of his barefeet and mocking the fact that we live by the beach like white hippies (although she didn't say white hippies...I added that in for dramatic effect...as if this story needed dramatic effect, right?).  She asked why we adopted so young & when I was going to have my own...to which I replied with a nod over in John's direction & said "I do have my own."  She wasn't satisfied with my answer as she continued to ask the same question a few more times.    She asked if we were going to meet with 'T' again and I replied that I hoped so.  She said I should be afraid that she'd change her mind & take him.  There was an onslaught of other things said that both hurt & angered me...and I walked away with my spirits crushed & my heart hurt. 


 As I drove away from church with my precious cargo buckled safely into his car seat I tried to sort through all that had just happened.  I cried tears that stung and prayed for help.

Then...I realized that I did not have to stand there and take any of that.  I realized that this woman is not the first and will not be the last with such strong opinions on me and my family.  and I realized that my heart hurt something fierce because it is my job to love & protect my son & one day he will be old enough to understand these types of conversations and at that time I will defend my family (I pray) with grace & dignity.  Today, I failed at doing so...but I will call today a practice run.  A trial.  And though her words still sting, I know that this is the family that the Lord has designed.  Matthew, me & John John.  One day we will add to the mix more sweet children & we will be in charge of loving & protecting them as well...

I am searching for words now to end this post....something that sums this all up...but I am still processing my day so a summary seems beyond me right now.  All I know is that as I was listening to this woman talk everything in me told me that John John is right where he belongs & for that I will always be grateful.

 

P.S. I see nothing ghetto about my son's hair...

Giveaway Update!

So excited to announce that the Noonday Collection Giveaway deadline is looming ahead!  There is one day left to enter in for a chance to win over $300 worth of beautiful (and tasty) goodies!  ...You can check out all that is up for grabs and enter HERE!

And thank you to everybody who has already donated, entered & spread the word...I have been blessed by your generosity & am that much closer to getting to Africa because of YOU!